I used to do this all the time when I was sick. I’d write a post that was full of absurdity and surrealism.

Then, the aliens landed, and all that changed.

They came and knocked on my door politely, asking to borrow a cup of sweetener. When I asked if they wanted real sugar or artificial, they acted like they couldn’t understand the difference. I realized I didn’t either. It’s all artificial. People make all of it. Natural sweetener comes from the cane, and those only grow in tropical areas. I live in Midwest USA, so no cane.

I told them to go to Hawaii. That was my first mistake. My second was forgetting the one alien’s name. How embarrassing. I ended up giving them a little of each kind – the white, blue, pink and yellow stuff. Let them sort it out.

Why was it a mistake to tell them to go to Hawaii? They didn’t have a map, and they hit a parked car and a tree. I gave them all coffee, and they could fly. I asked them to give me something so I could fly. They gave me something. I could only levitate, but I’ll take it.

I owe them that much.


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